We are focusing a great deal these days on quantity – the number of foreclosures, stock market fluctuations, billions spent to help businesses who have not managed their practices by looking at EVERYONE’S big picture…quality seems to only come into the picture when the quantity is gone.
I recently made a switch in my thinking about my health that I’m still struggling with. I haven’t had insurance coverage for years due to being a temp as a way to manage my lupus ‘recovery’ and then, as a self-employed contractor who barely squeaks by. I have always known that living on such a minimalist budget may not be responsible financially, but qualitatively – it has given me a life. I earn less, but receive my meds for free. I work less giving me more energy and better overall health without relying on state assistance. I have fewer possessions, but appreciate what I do have or receive from others that mean more to me.
My most recent move was in joining a gym. Shelling out the money for a year sent me into a panic when I saw that cash leave my hand. All that money – but then, I reconsidered what that amount of money truly offered.
For less than a dollar a day, I have access to opportunity, people and equipment that I don’t have right now for free. By focusing on quantities, we actually can translate them into improving more quality. The quantity of minutes away from the house on a treadmill can reduce the quantity of dollars spent on refilling BP meds (more time between refills). Spending quantity from my house budget will potentially reduce the dosage quantity of Cellcept needed to keep my lupus out of my kidneys. I will probably also reduce the quantity of time lost from work due to not feeling well. What does a month’s supply of anti-depressant medication cost these days, by the way? Let’s not forget to mention the quantity staring up at me from yet another doctor’s bill. How about my intention to avoid more quantity placed on my credit card for new clothes placed in my closet that I need – because I no longer fit into what I have.
If you’ve ever participated in a scrip program, the premise is that you will ‘eventually‘ have to shop and so you buy store/business scrip in values ranging from $5 to $50 (or more) for future use. It’s just changing the token you will exchange to get what you want or need. The tough part is in the anticipation or planning aspect to using scrip. It is putting your spending into a very ‘future-oriented’ view rather than being impulsive or unorganized about it, which is really hard to change. The upside is that you are investing into a common good- someone is benefitting from your participation in the program, besides yourself, through receiving a percentage of your purchased investment.
What a wonderful and positive way to view buying into a gym membership. We hear about how we can save dollars by skipping the gym fees and taking care of ourselves through free online sources or creating our own workout programs. Yet, is there anyone out there (besides me) who doesn’t necessarily lack motivation, but gets lonely in doing it by yourself? I know I do and I also know that, if I don’t do something soon, I will continue to experience all of those lupus symptoms I have been able to avoid when I was younger and in better shape. Changing my ‘attack’ on this declining state of being would be better served by considering it as an investment of quality rather than a divestment of quantity.
Perhaps that is the case of our current health care crisis. Listening to many share their experiences with lupus as individual pursuits, there is a great deal of frustration in not receiving the acknowledgement or support needed from others in recognizing our personal efforts toward managing our health. Whether it be the ever-so-helpful family member who suggests we “just lose some weight“, a doctor who tells us that he doesn’t know why we are experiencing that symptom and can’t do anything about it, the article that tells us to have a more ‘positive’ attitude completely overshadowing the reality of our challenges, or the insurance provider who tells us that the thousands of dollars we have paid into their pockets doesn’t allow us to determine what are or are not ‘covered treatment options’. We need to have our hard work noticed and appreciated, even if our progress isn’t easily visible.
It is also difficult for ourselves to notice the value in what we do accomplish, because we’re too busy being distracted by our ‘shoulds’ and ‘shouldn’ts’. Daily, we take steps in caring for the quality of our lives and we need to be sure to acknowledge, within ourselves first and foremost, the value we see our lives to be worth.
I will eventually come around to being okay with shelling out that gym membership, because the scrip that I will be using is my own self-determination. Some of it will get lost in my purse or put through the wash, leaving it unused and without redeemable value. However, the majority of that personal scrip will be used, because I value the quality of my days and know that it does include looking at quantity, too. My contributions to an overall good will come from my participating in a program…any program. This common good includes those I share my days with and offers me ways to show them the appreciation I feel having them around. I believe I will also be acknowledging to others that I am serious about being a part of this community and well worth the investment - lupus or not.
